by Elizabeth Hammons
"Oh, sorry, I can't go to Chic with you. I'm going over to the (fill in the blank) house to watch wrestling. Yeah, I just can't get enough of it! Plus, those guys are like, my best friends. I just baked two dozen cookies from scratch just in case the boys get hungry. I mean, I'm over at "the house" so much, I should practically move in. They all think so! That reminds me, are you going to the serenade tomorrow night? It's going to be amazing. If you want to make posters for some of the guys, just stop by my room. I'll be putting the finishing touches on all of mine. No big deal, I'm just making each member and pledge a poster with his name spelled in glitter. I need to charge my camera battery tonight; gotta make sure I get a picture of every song at every dorm! Oh, you only go to the serenade at your dorm? That's...nice. Have you heard what they're doing for Tunes? It's going to be really funny. I mean, it's so good I hope they beat my club. JK!"
"Yeah, bro, I'm totally up for lunch at the caf. I just want to say hi to a couple of my friends over at the (fill in the blank) table. Oh no, they want me to stay and eat with them. Is that cool? They need my opinion on the shirts for the crush dance. Did you get invited? Don't sweat it. I'm sure your invite is in the mail. They just gave me one in person last night while I was helping move their giant wooden letters off the football field. I'm totally psyched about the outing. I can tell one of their pledges to ask you if you really want to go; they owe me since I was in their date auction. I'll bring it up when I go to their carwash today. Autozone, 12-5, be there! I've got to drop these letters in the mail before I go. It's nothing. I just wrote a letter to each one of their pledges, telling her she chose an amazing club. No reason, I just wanted to give them a little encouragement. Oh yeah, I can't make the intramural game today because I've got to coach their football team, then I promised the girls I'd help set up for the mixer. I don't know what time the "rest" of you are supposed to be there. Check my wall-to-wall with the social chairs."
So, I stumbled onto this web page (yes, at 3am - that alone smacks of creepdom, I know), and I would have just lurked it quietly, but it was too clever, and I really wanted to commend it. I especially liked the post about music majors. I felt less creepy commenting here on the post of my friend, Beth, whose insight into the machinations of social club politics is unparalleled. It's like reading a biography of my own rise to influence in the turbulent world of Tri Chi powerbrokers. Great site!
ReplyDeleteJohn Raines